21

by Maxel Toft

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1.
01:44
2.
02:00
What did you do for to ruin my day and to cause me to say things I never should say? Why are you so innocently mean? What could it be that could make me attack when I swore to myself that I'd never fight back? Why am I so innocently mean? Ugly old words meant to build up our pride tend to force us to stay on the opposite side Why are we so innocently mean? How can we be innocently mean? You took a stand and stood up to us all but your tower is weak and will certainly fall Why are you so innocently mean? I joined the mob and I sure played along but I wished I could quit when I found it was wrong Why am I so innocently mean? Confident posture but really unsure and then that's how we hurt when we're all insecure Why are we so innocently mean? How can we be innocently mean?
3.
02:26
A stone in this case wasn't an exercise in power It was the language of a coward This stone had its place on the road And should've remained under foot Because a stone in the air meant to hurt Reveals a crook There's an extra stone On Peter's custom built fireplace An extra stone Placed there by the builder As we sit around it Warming and relaxing When we sit around it Safe from winter weather But it doesn't fit It was placed there for effect He knew that if he put it there Then no one would forget . . .
4.
02:33
Someone in the peloton would rather be alone in front Someone in the peloton would rather be alone Leading the wheels of the riders unlikely to break Someone sprinting far ahead would choose the peloton instead Someone sprinting far ahead would choose the peloton Riding the wheels of the leaders unlikely to break Someone in the peloton prefers the complex peloton Someone in the peloton prefers the complex pack Riding the wheels of the leaders unlikely to break Someone sprinting far ahead is fine when they are far ahead Someone sprinting far ahead is fine when they are far Leading the wheels of the riders unlikely to break Someone falling far behind . . . Someone falling far behind . . .
5.
I was ready to write this letter of sorts A number of times in the past four months But each time a change in my outlook took place That prevented me from signing my name I want you to know I'm ashamed of myself This illness, depression, and everything else I can't seem to figure a way to adjust Into this latest expression of trust If I could just sort it all out in my mind These feelings internal that aren't resting right It's nobody's fault that I know I don't know But it's awful to be feeling this low I'm afraid I have come to the end of the rope The recent two days have not been so hopeful Please forgive me for what I must do It will be very tough on all of you You'll find me up on the road across from Eames old farm, Co. E across from Egg Harbor Orchards I know that I would have so much more left to live for But I don't want to lose my wife as I know her There's no better mother for our family She's been such a good match for me Please understand that we don't want to hurt you Seventy-seven years is more than many will get through Your mother and I have had a lot to discuss And this is the best way for us You'll find us up on the road across from Eames old farm, Co. E across from Egg Harbor Orchards We love you very much and appreciate your efforts Always love each other and care for each other Surrounded by the trouble that these actions will bring Know that love is the most important thing You'll find us up on the road across from Eames old farm, Co. E across from Egg Harbor Orchards
6.
I am waiting for it by Doing nothing but if I Accidentally do some Inhospitable move come Cover my legs with the earth of the Earth We are waiting apart though Not alone in the dark so Force yourself to explore some Find me here on the floor come Cover my arms with the earth of the Earth When the waiting ends for good Is often misunderstood Relativity for some Send the doubters also come Cover my head with the earth of the Earth
7.
02:38
What is wealth? What is power? It is "loving God and loving neighbor" But . . . Who's my neighbor now? Who is my neighbor now? You know a loving action is so difficult to define That now the lover barely knows which way to send it (Who is my neighbor now?) There are so many neighbors of so many different kinds That we are lost when we initiate this question (Who is my neighbor now?) And God is a secret on its own Or else a word we use in place of the unknown Who's my neighbor now? Who is my neighbor now? What is wealth? What is power? It is "loving God and loving neighbor" But . . . What is loving God? What is loving neighbor?
8.
02:37
Should there be a noun for a mother who's lost a baby? Like widow for a wife who has outlived a spouse A simple reminder that there has been a tragedy When you welcome them into your house Raising them up in your prayers and in company Join them in mourning while maintaining privacy They may reject your sincere hospitality But they cannot refuse to be loved They cannot refuse to be loved Should there be a noun for a father who's lost a baby? Like widower for a husband who has outlived a spouse A simple reminder that there has been a tragedy When you welcome them into your house Raising them up in your prayers and in company Join them in mourning while maintaining privacy They may reject your sincere hospitality But they cannot refuse to be loved They cannot refuse to be loved No they cannot refuse to be loved
9.
Why are there different ways To type a lowercase "a" One with a curly hair on its brain And the other I learned in first grade Again could you tell me please How you type a lowercase "g" Here is a "g" with an oval club foot And the other one just has a hook What about lowercase "t" Will somebody show it to me Here is a "t" with its toe sticking down And that one's a cross in the ground Oh lowercase "q" so cruel It's not like the one they taught me in school Then there is lowercase "l" I can't tell It could be an uppercase "I" or a one But now my essay is done

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released June 21, 2020

Mixed and mastered by Hans Christian at Studio 330

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Maxel Toft Wisconsin

Welcome, friends.
Here are some pieces written and recorded at various times.
Thank you for having me over.
We should do it again sometime.

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