I'll have an onion ring for you
Hopefully you'll say I do
As husband and wife
We'll mate for life
And you'll get to kiss the groom
Then we'll cut the wedding cake
You'll stuff some in my face
Then the real groom and bride
Will push us aside
And do more of the same
I don't think the bride will care
When you throw her bouquet in the air
We'll drink lots of wine
Write Just Married on a sign
And get rice in our hair
While the groom is at the bar
We'll tie some cans to his car
Then a motel with low rates
Is where we'll consecrate
This marriage of ours
The next week doesn't go so well
You'll tell me to go to hell
It won't be the same
After the Newlywed Game
You'll file for divorce when I'm sent back to jail